college life and the visayan tongue
Posted October 8, 2008on:
[the unedited one…so don’t be surprise with the grammar]
My life would have been different if im not in this place. I guess, understanding my lessons would have been easier. Listening in class would have been enjoyable. College life would not be as it is now.
Being a first year student in a university were majority of the students and instructors speaks an alien dialect is not a joke.i was born & raised in the land of hiligaynon speaking people and beingleft alone in this place, i sometimes felt helpless. Specially when there is nobod to do the translation for me and i am forced to speak in visayan with the unavoidable mixture of tagalog, english and hiligaynon thrown in.In times when people talk to me or ask something to me, i just gaze at them stupidly not knowing how to answer or how to put my answers into words. In class when teachers starts to speak in visayan and i try to ask them what they mean, all i get are laughters from my classmates instead of the translation that im desparately hoping.During these times, i onestly admit that i curse my classmates with every swear word i know in hiligaynon, which ould automatically stop them from laughing.And i love to tyhink they stop laughing because they are trying to figure out what i said.
i dont have much friends here. aside from the fact that i only enrolled here in the second semester, i still find myself enjoying more with people speaking my dialect. i always feel that im not free when speak in Bisaya. I am very cautious with the words since some hiligaynon words have different and nasty meanings in bisaya, and of course i always felt humiliated whenever i try to speak in bisaya and the people around me would explode in laughter since my bisaya is a little awkward or what we call “balingag” in hiligaynon.
i experienced alot of hardships within the last five months of my stay here, things i know i wouldnt experience when im at home. I never thought the day would come that i would be very thankful to be in the soild of negros occidental.In fact just reaching the boundary makes me sigh with relief.
Studying in Dumaguete, takes me out of my comfort zone. I am not fami9liar with the place and im not good with the dialect. At times when im left alone in a crowd of visayan speaking people, i felt teary and find myself thinking of going home.
They say College life is different. i never thought it would be this different.back in high school id always be reprimanded for being talkative, i had lots of friends and nobody takes advantage of me.here i seldom talk withmy seatmates, i only had a handful of friends who thankfully does the translation for me.When i was in high school, people think im start and witty.Now, i know they think im stupid.
Adapting to college life is not hard. In fact that the easy part.But adapting to the environment is the challenge.Thankfully, i have my pen and paper to turn to.My cellphone to connect me to my far-away friends and relatives and the internet to entertain me.Being new in this place makes me paranoid at times. I dont understand at least 70% of what people are saying. and i think its enough to shake anybody’s confidence.
On the other hand, i experienced a different kind of freedom here.I had developed a new perspective, and i had learned to adjust with different people around me.I had also developed new hobbies and interests, i gained new friends, joined new organizations and of course, though quiet slow, im learning how to speak bisaya.Well, i guess, i still have three and a half years to learn the dialect, and i cannoy wait for these people to adjust to me nor force them to learn my diealect. I have to do it myself. in this placewhere i had been left alone, snatched from my comfort zone, i had learned to stand and defend my self.
YEs, my life would have been different if i wasnt here.College life will not be as it is now.because if im still in negros occidental, id never be independent. I’d never be learn to be considerate otehr people,(as the youngest in the family. i am used to have people being considerate with me)i’d never learn to budget my allownce.id never experience things that made me realize that life is not all games and songs, Id never be the person i am now.And ill never be able to be the real me and unleash the identity hidden behind the rigid rules set by my over-protective family.
yes, someday ill be going home for good. That is, when i graduate from here.And i will never trade my college life in dumaguete for anything else.I will always look back to the things i experienced here.With tears and smiles.And i will always treasure this place..because in here i had become ME.